Nonexistent fic meme

[winter]

Stolen from far too many people on the f-list, which probably means I won't get comments...

If you make up titles for stories I didn't write, I will respond with details of those non-written stories. Just think of the possibilities! (If you'd like to include details you'd like, pairings or fandom or something, do that too.)

And hey, a twist to it: I'll actually write snippets of those nonexistent fics for you :>

Comments

[winter]

OMG why does everyone want lemons gah

If that wasn’t a pointless exercise in muse torture, I don’t know what was. Well, that and gratuituous descriptions of violence, of course. The tavern scene’s a common favourite – the one where they get their hands on the spy sent by the sorcerer who organised the thefts from their respective castle libraries.

The drawn-out death rattle was punctuated by Dracula’s frustrated snarl. The Wallachian vampire rose to his feet and gave the corpse a vicious kick.

“Then we’re back where we started,” von Krolock said.

“I didn’t see you lending a hand.” Dracula flexed his fingers as he unknotted the straps of freshly-flayed skin that he’d used to strangle the spy. “I should have made him eat his own flesh before I killed him.”

Von Krolock’s lips twitched in amusement. “How civilised.”

The skin straps broke with a wet tearing sound. Dracula’s eyes flashed blue with fury. With a hiss, he started forward, his hands curved into claws, reaching for von Krolock-

-who wasn’t there, in a swirl of a cloak and a shifting of shadows sudden and silent as the onset of a nightmare.

Dracula changed directions without pause, hitting a wooden support beam hard enough to make the roof tremble. He hissed, baring his lengthened teeth. On the other side of the beam, von Krolock hissed back, his face pale and drawn tight with a sudden flash of hunger.

For a moment, all was still.

Slowly, oh so slowly, Dracula’s fingers unclenched. The blood on them was still fresh.

It left uneven, dripping lines on von Krolock’s cheek.

“Show off your magic and your science all you want,” the Prince of Vampires whispered. “In the end, you’re still a monster. You’re still one of mine.”

[azarias.livejournal.com]

“I didn’t see you lending a hand.” Dracula flexed his fingers as he unknotted the straps of freshly-flayed skin that he’d used to strangle the spy. “I should have made him eat his own flesh before I killed him.”

I'm debating whether or not to be concerned about the fact that everything in this paragraph made me laugh uproariously.

“Show off your magic and your science all you want,” the Prince of Vampires whispered. “In the end, you’re still a monster. You’re still one of mine.”

Okay, that's hot.

[winter]

Vlad's a possessive one, isn't he? He's very sweet like that :D

*eyes the even more annoyed vampire warily*

[ciciaye.livejournal.com]

Excellent stuff :-)
CCA

[winter]

I do regret my VH!Vlad's too monogamous to actually follow through on this :>